It’s no secret that being in a wedding costs a pretty penny. Between dresses, travel, and gifts, chances are you’ll be shelling out a good chunk of cash for bridesmaid costs. But no one wants to be the Debbie Downer bridesmaid who opts out of the bridal showers or bachelorette weekend. And besides, you’d want to be there to celebrate your friend.

Still, the cost of being in someone else’s wedding party is staggering. Credit Karma recently released a survey showing that nearly 20 percent of millennials have spent $1,000 on someone else’s wedding, and according to reporting from Refinery29, the costs of being a bridesmaid are astronomical. The publication surveyed 15 women to get a handle on just how much the average bridesmaid is spending.

The highest total cost of the women surveyed was $2,300, the lowest being $310. Though almost every woman said that she felt the costs were a bit much, they found ways to justify them. “I think weddings overall are such a waste of money, but I support celebrating people in love!” a 27-year-old bridesmaid told the publication. “Being a bridesmaid is a true compliment and testament to your friendship with your friend.”

Others commented on the awkwardness of trying to avoid certain bridesmaid costs. When discussing her friend’s expensive bachelorette getaway, one woman said: “There were some options to cut down on the cost, but I wasn’t the one planning it so there wasn’t much I could do.”

“For the bachelorette party in particular, I didn’t have a lot of input in terms of where our money was going, so that was difficult,” said another, “For the wedding, there were ways to cut costs, but I didn’t want to be the only bridesmaid to go without.”

Though a majority of women lamented certain aspects of being a bridesmaid, most felt it was worth it for their friend’s special day. Many also concluded that they would only do it again for their sibling or a very close friend — and that they’d do things differently for their own wedding.

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